Sounds like the title for a not so funny film, but it's my life!

May - My Aunty Jean's funeral
June- My dad
July- My mum
2nd Aug my friend gets married.
Today my Sister in Laws brother died. So that will be the fourth funeral in as many months

Has anyone ever seen "Life of Grime" with Mr Trebus? Well for those of you that haven't I will enlighten you. Mr Trebus was a polish gentleman living in Haringey North London. He had a hobby, he collected things, the things he collected were stacked around, and outside his house. Making it dangerous to live in.
Now for a long while we have reffered to Abi as "Mrs Trebus" she loves to hoard and is famous for staking things in her wardrobe, under her bed etc. No she is a teen, she like my other children before her, is expected to tidy her room
Abi's has been needing a new bed for a while, and as we are clearing my mum's house (which has a nice new single bed) we have decided to decorate her room, before installing the new bed.
What a revelation! Under Abi's bed was loaded with all manner of goodies. Stashed in various bags (school, hnadbags etc) were packets of crisps, all now sadly out of date. Perhaps she was scared we would run out. I found all the odd socks and some matching ones...oh and knickers!!!! Oh Lordy!!!!!

Hopefully she will be pleased when she gets back, her room will be decorated, her PC (she inherited from Grandad) will be installed. Only we are decorating it cream....................she wanted purple walls

I fully understand this little mites father not accepting his baby could be snatched away with no one to blame but a cruel twist of fate. SID is a terrible thing and I know my friend when she lost her little boy, 26 years ago, struggled and constantly blamed herself or looked at what had happened in his final days to find a reason.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/london/7529152.stm

Wherever you may be, hope you are in good health
xx

Jon Rosling is an up an coming independant film maker. I was invited to the screening of "The Secret" in Sheffield and I'm glad I went. Not being a total film buff (unlike some of you) I can't offer critique (is that a word?)on camera direction etc. But the film is good! Keep a look out for it. The film has been submitted to many short film festivals.

The Secret is a film about the themes of isolation and frustration, told through the experience of a teenage boy during what appears to be a normal day at school.

The film begins with the familiar and routine start of a school day – a school bus pulls up, feet march to class, books are placed on desks. For David, his late arrival distinguishes him from the others, a distinction that frustratingly continues in class as his teacher and classmates appear to ignore him.

Young Rosie offers David some clues and tells him of a secret that he must figure out for himself. She warns him of sinister others who might try to prevent him finding out. His frustrations reach boiling point before David comes face to face with his darkest imaginings. As he flees the school in fear he finally realises the true horror of the secret…

“We shot The Secret over four days during the Easter school break and had to be off set by 6pm each day, so the scheduling and on-set organisation had to be really well organised. Everyone did a fantastic job and my pushing that strong team ethic we were done on time and on schedule every day. That even includes the day we had to rearrange the outdoor shoot for the weather!”
- Jon Rosling, Writer / Director

Find out more here: http://thesecret.eyefilms.co.uk/index.html

I have a big black cloud following me everywhere. I go to bed and think I have slept but wake up knackered, today I woke up at 12noon after going to bed at 11.30pm. To be honest I could have stayed there.
I feel bad, Ami and the tots are here but I have no patience and find myself getting wound up really quickly.
S'pose it'll take time

Over the last couple of months I went off "pro" status. I decided to leave it, seeing as I wasn't blogging often.
I can't stand it no more!!!!
So I signed back up, sick off the "congratulations you have won an Audi" banners.

Thanks all for your support over the last six months. Tomorrow we give my mum a send off fitting for her (our local MP is attending, they'll never hear the last of it in heaven!)

We'll then begin the process of emptying mum & dad's house, the house we all grew up in, and most of the family were born in. We'll then sell it.

On Saturday I have decided to attend a prebooked ghost hunt at the "Ancient Ram Inn" Mum and Dad were always interested in my paranormal exploits (dad even went with a message to come back at some point and tell someone) so, as Lee says, they would want life to go on.

The tots arrive this afternoon

And the rain has stopped!

Enough rambling!

Our family tell a lot of lies,
We never did before.
But from now until we die,
We'll tell a whole lot more.

Ask our family how we are
And because we can't explain,
We will tell a little lie
Because we can't describe the pain.

Ask our family how we are
We'll say 'We’re alright.'
If that's the truth, then tell me,
Why do we cry each night?

Ask our family how we are
We seem to cope so well.
We don’t have a choice you see,
Nor the strength to yell.

Ask our family how we are
'We’re fine, We’re well, We’re coping.'
We can’t bear to tell the truth,
And say our hearts are broken.

Dot & Jack

Tuesday was a day that will be forever etched in Abi's memory. She was hugged and kissed by "Josh" who she has fancied for ages. They're not going out with each other yet, but they "got off" with each other She has asked him out (not shy my girl!!!) He said He really, really, really likes her but he's confused, he's not sure he wants to be with anyone, and there are some people who would be upset if he did He's in a band!) She said "So that's a no then" He said "I never said no" Lee is having a fit! Me and Ami find it funny

Oh to be 12 again!!

Oh yeah, and her nan died. That bit hit her this morning. I'm glad it did.

Thanks everyone for your messages. We're concentrating on putting one foot in front of the other and breathing........

Mum and dad had been together over 58 years. Dad dying 4 weeks and 5 days ago wasn't going to stop that.

Reunited in Heaven, dad just went on ahead to make sure it was good enough for her!