Today is mum's birthday. I stayed with her last night and spent the morning with her. Hard to sit, my dad not being there hurts so much. God knows how mum feels, they would have been married 58 years this year.

I think this song says it all.

I believe- Diamond Rio

Every now and then soft as breath upon my skin
I feel you come back again
And its like you havent been gone a moment from my side
Like the tears were never cried
Like the hands of time are holding you and me
And with all my heart Im sure were closer than we ever were
I dont have to hear or see, Ive got all the proof I need
There are more than angels watching over me
I believe, I believe

Chorus
That when you die your life goes on
It doesnt end here when youre gone
Every soul is filled with light
It never ends and if Im right
Our love can even reach across eternity
I believe, I believe

Forever, youre a part of me
Forever, in the heart of me
And Ill hold you even longer if I can
The people who dont see the most
Say that I believe in ghosts
And if that makes me crazy, then I am
cause I believe

There are more than angels watching over me
I believe, I believe

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Thanks all for your messages on my previous blog.

The day of Dad's funeral turned out to be a hot sunny day, the type of day dad would have loved. Sadly dad's garden chair sat leaning against the wall as people began to arrive for the funeral.
The cars were due to arrive at 11.30am but people were arriving from 11am. I was actually oblivious to what was going on and with Lee on one side Abi on the other didn't leave the house until the cars arrived. I did notice people stood out on the street to watch the coffin drive by (an old village tradition) and all the curtains on the street were closed. The sight of dad's coffin in the hearse almost broke my heart and I don't think I actually stopped crying throughout.
As we neared the local church, Lee tells me there were masses of people outside. The vicar had opened up the doors into the back of the church and added extra seating, apparently there were still people who needed to stand. My dad will have been impressed with that!
We had two hymns, "The lord's my shepherd" and "All things Bright and beautiful" During the service we had a CD of my dad singing "Don't laugh at me cos I'm a fool" while it was on I wondered why we put ourselves through it but I can imagine dad bragging in heaven "I sang at my own funeral" The reading we had was:

You can shed tears that he is gone,
Or you can smile because he lived,
You can close your eyes and pray that he will come back,
Or you can open your eyes and see all that he has left.
Your heart can be empty because you can't see him
Or you can be full of the love that you shared,
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday,
Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.
You can remember him and only that he is gone
Or you can cherish his memory and let it live on,
You can cry and close your mind be empty and turn your
back,
Or you can do what he would want: smile, open your eyes,
love and go on.

and the vicar gave her eulogy (none of us felt up to speaking) which was brilliant and moving, the vicar herself shed a tear more than once.

The coffin was lifted and carried out as Gracie Fields struck up with "Wish me luck as you wave me Goodbye" which brought about laughter and tears.

http://jack-wootton.gonetoosoon.co.uk/