Rotherham Family

Went to Fat Class. Weight has stayed the same. I'm sure the drugs aren't helping as they have an adverse effect on the plumbing!

Lee is getting on with the kitchen and has just yelled "Do you think you could give me a hand in a bit?" which when translated means. Get off the PC and do something useful; Oh well, he's back at work Saturday so I will miss him then!

Abi went back to school this morning, got up no problem and was out of the door 15 minutes earlier than usual. She wanted to call for a boy up the street. She's desperately looking for someone to hang out with tomorrow evening for Halloween as her so called "best friend" has decided she is hanging out with some other girls and Abi isn't welcome. Why are girls so nasty? When we were younger it was the more the merrier and we regularly hung out with other groups.

I do worry about her, she isn't "cool", doesn't wear, or want to wear designer gear, and would prefer a game of footie rather than stand watching boys. I'm sure she'll find her own way, but it's so much harder than when we were kids!

oh well must go, hubby has just glared!!!!!

Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties & local pubs to be alert and remain cautious when offered a drink by any woman.

Many females use a date rape drug on the market called "Beer."

The drug is found in liquid form and is available anywhere. It comes in cans,
bottles, or from taps and in large "kegs".

Beer is used by female sexual predators at parties and bars to persuade their male victims to go home and sleep with them.
A woman needs only to get a guy to consume a few units of Beer and then
simply ask him home for no strings attached sex.

Men are rendered helpless against this approach. After several beers, men will often succumb to the desires to sleep with horrific looking women whom they would never normally be attracted.

After drinking beer, men often awaken with only hazy memories of exactly what happened to them the night before, often with just a vague feeling that "something bad" occurred.

At other times these unfortunate men are swindled out of their life's savings, in a familiar scam known as "a relationship."
In extreme cases, the female may even be shrewd enough to entrap the unsuspecting male into a longer term form of servitude and punishment referred to as "marriage."

Men are much more susceptible to this scam after beer is administered and sex is offered by the predatory females.

If you fall victim to this "Beer" scam and the women administering it, there are male support groups where you can discuss the details of your shocking encounter with similarly victimized men.

For the support group nearest you, just look up "Golf Courses" in the Yellow Pages.

Oh well, my own fault, stayed up till past midnight watching Most Haunted Live! I know, so sad! It was of they were in Edinburgh vaults and as well as the usual bumps in the dark the cameraman (Stuart) attacked the producer (Karl) and threw him across the room. The crew then promptly began to pass out!
As a member of a local paranormal group, I can't wait till I am well enough to go on a vigil and test some theories for real. Oh well till then I'll leave it to Yvette, here's hoping tonight some bugger launches Kieran o'Keefe across the room. Smug git that he is!

Off to fat class this morning, I have got weighed and put 2lb on as far as I can tell, no clue where from but hey ho!

I then have to call work with the news that I won't be back anytime soon, wish me luck!

Found a good site, you can translate any text into any dialect!

Here's one I did earlier

Aye up orl had uz blog translated by eur gran' si'. thee can translate intoa orl dialects!

The site is: http://www.whoohoo.co.uk/

Hope you all have a good day. Send `positive thoughts to wensum24 who is back in the theatre today!

Abi my daughter said today

"I needed my inhaler this morning, but couldn't find it"
"Why didn't you wake us" I asked
"you were awake I listened at your door" she replied
"Why didn't you come in?" I asked
" Cos you and dad were having Shnoo Shnoo" she replied
"What's shnoo Shnoo?" I asked.

She looked at me and her dad, winked and said "you know!"

Mmmmmmm

My son, being made redundant from his IT job started a temp job in a Call Centre close to home. He lost said job on friday, the reason, for making a homophobic comment to a staff member

The story goes like this:

Matt started at the company with a girl called Nina who he got on really well with from day 1. She even took a detour each day to give him a lift. Following the training they were appointed different teams, but sat back to back as they worked. One day they had been having a laugh over lunch, on the thread of "girls are bad because, boys are bad because" This apparently carried on after lunch and a girl sat next to nina joined in. Matt made a comment that they smelled because "All girls smell" and they all laughed. The girls sat next to Matt, who had ignored him up to this point (1 week!) asked what they were laughing at. Matt replied "I said they smell because girls smell"
This girl got very abusive to Matt and said "Oh so because I am a Lesbian, you do not count me as a girl!" Matt tried to point out that he hadn't meant any offence to her, but hadn't included her as she wasn't part of the original joke. She went into the Manager's office and Matt was hauled in front of the HR manager.
The HR manager didn't ask for Matthew's side of the story and ripped shreds out of him for his "homophobic comments", Matthew managed to get into the conversation that he would NEVER be homophobic as he himself is Gay and had suffered homophobic bullying at school, He also hadn't a clue that this girl was Gay as she had ignored him to that point, even when he'd asked for her help! The HR manager would not hear anything and said I think we need to think about whether you are suitable for the position. Matthew promptly told her he didn't think he was, but he would work till the end of the day thanks, and walked out!
I was initially peed off that he'd walked out of the job, but am on the whole proud that he stood up for himself. He has since found out that this girl saw him as a threat as she is the only "gay" employee. As Matt says, perhaps the girl has a problem with her sexuality if she needs to wear it as a badge.
He came out to us at 15, it hasn't been easy for him but I think this shows he is dealing with it in a mature way.
My advise to him for working life is "manipulate the situation, and be all things to all men" I carry that into work with me every day!

Can't wait to see him live this month!!!

a.. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'llsqueeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"

a.. Who was the first person to say "See that chicken there....I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's butt."

a.. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a
horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

a.. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

a.. If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

a.. If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

a.. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

a.. Why does your GYNAE leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

a.. Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

a.. What do you call male ballerinas?

a.. Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??

a.. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap,why
didn't he just buy dinner?

a.. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

a.. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

a.. If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

a.. Isn't Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?

a.. Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

a.. Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

a.. Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your ass?

a.. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he can't wait to stick his head out the window into the wind?

a.. Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

So I will keep posting the pumpkin pictures!!!

Hope you are all well, doctor was a total waste of space yesterday, so we won't go there!!

Had to get up at 7.30am cos Lee had hired a van to help his brother (nice one! not the knob head!)move and it had to be back by 8.30am. I had to follow him in the car and it was the first time I had driven for almost a month!! I ddn't crash which is a bonus!

We then went to Focus, homebase and MFI in that order. Because we had a radiator fitted in the kitchen Lee had to take out a corner unit, the whole bloody worktop collapsed. Any way..... We bought two new worktops, and some paint and door handles. Lee is making new kitchen doors. We also spied some floor tiles on sale and Lee has worked out we can redo the whole kitchen/utility room for £30 so he is off to buy them this afternoon! meaning I will have a new looking kitchen for about £300! He's such a clever boy!

Abi is off to watch Rotherham United this afternoon with her Aunty & Cousin and Matt is working 3-11pm so it will be very peaceful this afternoon!

Hope you are all having a good day!

Hellooooo

Thanks to all my blog friends for your support over the last couple of days. I have decided I am not going to let the b*stards get me down, so what if the NHS is full of incompetent, heartless idiots. I am not going to let it beat me!

Off to see GP at 4pm to discuss options, and Ma & Pa (god bless em) have offered to pay for a private consultation with Gynae if he needs to get involved re adhesions. I have promised Lee I won't cry after that (my GP always makes me cry, he is too sympathetic!)

Hope you are all well and have weekend plans!

On my new eating plan (I hate the word diet)I am allowed up to 15 sins a day. It's up to me how I use them (1 vodka is 2.5 syns)
Today whilst doing my big shop I picked up the above, and double chocolate flavour too!!

They are huge, filling and better still only 5 syns each!! That's great considering I bought myself and Onken Mousse the other day and gave it my son as, despite it's low fat label it was 8 syns! Bloody hell that's 2 vodkas and a packet of Asda cheese curls!!

Yummy.............

kiki mentioning castles got me thinking. You know when you're on holiday you visit castles? We've done Warwick, Winkworth and Alnwick to name but a few! But you don't think about what is on your doorstep do you?

The castle above is Conisbrough and is a mere 15 minutes drive away (7 if Lee drives!) It used to be a favourite for school trips and we just worked out that Abi has never been. We have promised to take her by the end of half term (it's lagging it down here and I have my BIG shop to do at Asda so today is a no go)

History:

The first castle built on the site was in 1088, although the present castle dates back to 1180 which is the cylindrical keep followed after by the walls. The buildings wthin weren't built until the 13th century. The castle is steeped in history and more detail can be found on the official website here: http://www.conisbroughcastle.org.uk/History/history.htm

Heard this on VH1 this morning.

We are watching Ring 2, just taking a break as Lee is walking the dog.

I am soooo scared!!!

I blame the medication!!!!

In the Red Dwarf Episode "Backwards" the crew end up on a parallel universe that goes backwards in time. For those who were anal enough to reverse the speech to see what the people talking backwards were saying, there was a small suprise in store for you.

Ready for the weekend:

How to Rate a Hangover
Only those who have been there can identify with this.........

One Star Hangover (*)
No pain. No real feeling of illness. You're able to function relatively well. However, you are still parched. You can drink 5 sodas and still feel this way. For some reason, you are craving a steak & fries.

Two Star Hangover (**)
No pain, but something is definitely amiss. You may look okay, but you have the mental capacity of a staple gun. The coffee you are chugging is only increasing your rumbling gut, which is still tossing around the kebab from the 3:00 AM, kebab shop excursion. There is some definite havoc being wreaked upon your bowels.

Three Star Hangover (***)
Slight headache. Stomach feels crappy. You are definitely not productive. Anytime a girl walks by you gag because her perfume reminds you of the flavored schnapps shots your alcoholic friends dared you to drink. Life would be better right now if you were home in your bed watching TV. You've had 4 cups of coffee, a gallon of water, 3 lucozades and a diet Coke --- yet you haven't peed once.

Four Star Hangover (****)
Life sucks. Your head is throbbing. You can't speak too quickly or else you might puke. Your boss has already lambasted you for being late and has given you a lecture for reeking of booze. You wore nice
clothes, but that can't hide the fact that you only shaved one side of your face. (For the ladies, it looks like you put your make-up on while riding the bumper cars.) Your eyes look like one big red vein,
and even your hair hurts. Your sphincter is in perpetual spasm, and the first of about five shits you take during the day brings water to the eyes of everyone who enters the bathroom.

Five Star Hangover(*)
You have a second heartbeat in your head, which is actually annoying the employee who sits next to you. Vodka vapor is seeping out of every pore and making you dizzy. You still have toothpaste crust in the corners of your mouth from brushing your teeth in an attempt to get the remnants of the poop fairy out. Your body has lost the ability to generate saliva so your tongue is suffocating you. You don't have the foggiest idea who the hell the stranger was passed out in your bed this morning. Any attempt to
defecate results in a fire hose like discharge of alcohol-scented fluid with a rare 'floater' thrown in. The sole purpose of this 'floater' seems to be to splash the toilet water all over your butt. Death sounds pretty good about right now....

I can deal with that

A Yorkshireman had emigrated to America, but still used to receive news from home by mail.
One day, he got the following telegram:
'Regret father died this morning STOP early hours. Funeral Wednesday STOP Yorkshire two hundred and one for six STOP Boycott not out ninety six.'

Apart from being free, the film was great.

Set mainly in Provance in Southern France I suppose as a comedy love story some people will see it as a chick flick, but the fellas enjoyed the film as much as we did.

Off to see the new Kate Winslet next week.....Don't ya just love freebies

1. Save all your beef fat. You will be instructed later how to use it.

2. If you forget a Northerner's name, refer to him (or her) as "Love"

3. Just because you can't drive on snow and ice does not mean we always have to give you lifts everywhere.

4. If you do run your car into a ditch, don't panic. Four men in > the cab of a four wheel drive with a 12-pack of Carly Special and a tow chain will be along shortly. Don't try to help them. Just stay out of their way. This is what they live for.

5. Don't be surprised to find video rentals and bait in the same store.

6. Do not try to buy fresh pasta. Thump in gob tends to offend..

7. If it can't be fried in lard, it ain't worth cooking.

8. Remember: "Us" is singular. "Thaa" is plural. "Thaas" is plural possessive.

9. There is nothing sillier than a Southerner imitating a northern accent, unless it is a northerner imitating a Brummie accent.

10. Get used to hearing, "Tha not from around here, are tha?"

11. People walk slower.

12. Don't be worried that you don't understand anyone. They don't understand you either.

13. The first Northern expression to creep into a transplanted Southerner's vocabulary "me ducks", Eighty-five percent end their new northern influenced dialect with this expression. One hundred percent are in denial about it.

14. The proper pronunciation you learned in school is no longer proper.

15. Be advised: The "He were a southern bugger" ia a legal defence up here.

16. If attending a funeral in the north take your baseball hat off when everyone else does.

17. If you hear a Northern kid exclaim, "Ayup, come and look at this!" stay out of his way. These are likely the last words he will say before the explosion.

18. Most Northerners do not use turn signals, and they ignore those who do. In fact, if you see a signal blinking on a car with a northern licence plate, you may rest assured that it was on when the car was purchased.

19. Southerners can be identified by the spit on the inside of their car's windscreen that comes from yelling at other drivers.

20. The summer wardrobe you always brought out in April can wait til June.

21. If there is the prediction of the slightest chance of even the most minuscule accumulation of sun, your presence is required at the local chemist. It does not matter if you need anything from there, it is just something you're supposed to do.

22. Satellite dishes are very popular in the North. When you purchase one, it is to be positioned directly in front of your caravan. This is logical, bearing in mind that the dish cost considerably more than the caravan and should, therefore, be displayed.

23. Blizzards and Northerners going through a divorce have a lot in common. In either case, you know someone is going to lose a caravan.

24. Leeds does NOT have a castle, no matter how often you ask us.

25. In Northern churches you will hear the hymn, "Come All Ye Faithful". You will also hear expressions such as, "Bugger me, Lord", "God knows", "Jesus wept!" and "God help the poor cow ".

26. As you are cursing the person driving 15 mph in a 55 mph zone, directly in the middle of the road, remember, many folks learned to drive on a model of vehicle known as a Reliant Robin, and this is the proper speed and lane position for the vehicle.

27. You can ask a Northerner for directions, but unless you already know the positions of key piles of rubble, canals, coal mines, railway crossings, and where factories used to stand, you're better off trying to find it yourself.

As my last post says I have been to fat class. After class, which consists of awarding slimmer of the week (can't be your 1st week, must have attended class and lost or maintained the week before) having a chat and food tasting (Mexican Soup...Yummy!) We ventured out to find the car park full.
The class is held in what is called "The Barn" and is next to St Albans church. The church is beautiful, as my two eldest went to the church school, we attended all assemblies there. With the amount of cars we realised there was a funeral and that it wul be impossible for Lee to get up the church Lane to pick us up in the car, so we walked down to the main road. As we did so the funeral courtage arrived.
First of all there was the sound of music then a New Orleans Marching Band came into the lane, I have to admit the tune they played gave me goosebumps. This was followed by the hearse which held the coffin, made out of wicker. Non of the mourners wore black, which looked very unusual.
I found the announcement of the death in the local paper and it stated that Gillian, who died of cancer, requested donations to the local cancer hospital instead of flowers, and that no one was to wear black. I was glad to see her wishes were carried out.
I didn't know the lady, though he maiden name was familiar. But I think any funeral makes you stop and think.
RIP Gillian, you went out in style!

Clip is of a typical funeral marching band:

I lost 3lb!!! making my total so far 2 stone!!!

Got some trousers and a T shirt out of the wardrobe that I have NEVER worn! You know the type girls, buy them, they don't fit but you keep them in the hope they will do.... one day. Good job I did, the trousers are a little loose so had I left it longer I would have slimmed out of them.

People are now commenting on how I look so I am very motivated!!!

Apart from waiting for the in laws who are now over 1 hour late arriving!!!!!!

UPDATE: 4.03pm..... still not bloody arrived!!! Obviouly thinks us minnions don't have lives!!!

I will be:

Sorting my clothes: I put on some trousers today and they are way too big So time for a charity bag, I hav no intention of wearing THAT size again!
Getting my hubby to put the travel cot, high chair and Ozzy's toys in the loft-But as he is watching Man Utd at the moment that will have to wait!
Cooking Sunday lunch - hubby has prepped the potatoes and veg, so I only need to cook
Hopefully then if the pain holds off, I will do my duty and visit my parents. At 74 & 79 years of age, it's a bit bad that the only time I have seen them this week is when they visited me.
I will then recline on the sofa to watch Reunion (sky 1) and a film we have Sky +.

I need to be well enough for fat class tomorrow the check the weight.

Hubby is now off work till November 4th so house is spick and span (he's a good un!!!)

Last night Ami & Ivo had a well deserved night out, as they live so far away from family, nights out are either seperate or ith Oskar in tow. He does recommend Zero Degrees in Blackheath & Noodle Time in Greenwich!!!!
Well Oskar went to sleep at 9pm, after I had sang "come little mouse" at least 15 times (it's a song I sang to my kids and Ami sings it to Oskar too)
He slept in the travel cot in our room, and I woke everytime he stirred. I also confess to checking his breathing more than once
At 5.30am he woke up and cried so I got up with him, according to Ami when I saw her later he would have gone back to sleep had I left him as he usually sleeps till 8 or 9. But in my view I would have lost out on extra ganny time! So I really didn't mind.
We played with his new interactive book, which he insists on turning on and off. We then resorted to wooden spoons and pans!!
Oskar & the dog, Milo have become great friends, Oskar spent 1/2 hour prodding (stroking) and laying on(hugging) him and the dog loved it. I keep a careful eye, but our dog is more inclined to lick someone to death than male them!
This afternoon Oskar is out in Sheffield with mummy, daddy & other granny. I call her the mad glam gran (shhhh) She is Macedonian and has a weird over the top personality that thankfully her son didn't inherit. She also dresses as if in Milan (ALL THE TIME!.
He'll be back here tonight then back on the train again tomorrow Oh well! As my hubby says "You have to share!!
I'll tell you something, he is better than any pain killers the doctor prescribes, I may still be in pain but he helps me forget it.

The cutie pie above is my grandson Oskar Samuel Petkovski, is 11 months old and as he lives in London I don't get to do the Granny thing often enough.
This weekend he, my daughter Ami and boyfriend Ivo have travelled up't north on a visit.
The picture above was taken after the poor little mite had travelled across London then 2 hours north by train, only to be hauled out of the buggy by this raving nutter who showered him in kisses (me) We then subjected him to a two hour birthday party for my 6 year old nephew..........No wonder he looks traumatised!!

Erm....

Yesterday's post was a joke!?!?!

I am sharing this with you because it's worked for me, and I have been able to find an inner peace.

The way to do this is to finish all those things you've started.

This morning I looked around at all the things i had started, and so far today I have finished:

The Vodka
The Baileys
The Tequila
The 1/2 bottle of red wine
and the valium!!

You have no idea how peaceful  I am feeling right now!

Hi all,

The picture above is of light rain falling on a backyard in Texas. Taken by a blog friend's dad.

Cool innit.

No weigh in this week, after little sleep I crawled back to bed wh pain killers and woke up too late for class. My scales say I stayed the same, but I'll weight (tee hee) for next monday for the official score on the door!

Your Clothes:

1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your ob-gyn confirms your pregnancy.

2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.

3rd baby: Your regular clothes ARE your maternity clothes.

The Baby's Name:

1st baby: You pore over baby name books and practice pronouncing and writing combinations of all your favorites.

2nd baby: Someone has to name their kid after great-aunt Mavis, right? It might as well be you.

3rd baby: You open a name book, close your eyes, and see where your finger falls. Bimaldo? Sounds good to me!

Preparing for birth:

1st baby: You practice your breathing regularly.

2nd baby: You don't bother practicing because you remember that last time, breathing didn't do a thing.

3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in the 8th month.

The Layette:

1st baby: You prewash your newborns clothes, color-coordinate them and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.

2nd baby: You check to make sure the clothes are clean and discard only those with the darkest stains.

3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they??

Worries:

1st baby: At the first sign of distress--a whimper, a frown--you pick up the baby

2nd baby: You pick up the baby when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.

3rd baby: You teach your 3yr old how to rewind the mechanical swing.

Activities:

1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swim and Baby Story Hour

2nd baby: Your take your infant to Baby Gymnastics

3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaners.

Going Out:

1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home five times.

2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.

3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.

At Home:

1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.

2nd baby: You spend a bit of every day watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking or hitting the baby

3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.

Today I am sat at my computer in a warm house! No need to "haul" the electric heater from the lounge, and I am sat in my PJs. Not the usual delightful ensemble of: Jammies, Socks, Slippers and Lee's dressing gown.
We have never had radiators on the ground floor of our home, I always found it very strange that the previous owner; despite extensive improvements, opted for upstaiheating only We always meant to "get round" to putting radiators in, forgot every summer and cursed every winter when we went to bed at 8pm to keep warm
However 2 weeks ago, visitors to our home said they smelt gas, despite being in the house 24/7 I couldn't smell it. We called Transco and the lovely man informed us we had a gas leak "somewhere" in the heating system, capped off the supply and toddled off in his van
We got a plumber, lovely bloke called Andy, who informed us the leak was somewhere between the meter and the gas fire (hidden under either my lovely kitchen tiles or lounge carpet and a foot of concrete)
We knew it had to be done anyway, so took the decision to have a full new system installed, remove the gas fires and put in a trendy chrome electric jobby! As we are taking out the whole chimney next year and making the ground floor open plan it was the best option. I have a new swish combi boiler and can't believe the dfference.

As the saying goes "small things........"

Hi all

Popping to update my ticker!

Despite being in pain, I insisted my hubby drove me to fat class yesterday. I only lot 1/2lb but that's the 1/2 I gained last week so I am happy

Still suffering the after effects of Friday so will blog further when I feel a little better

All

Those of you who have given birth will be familiar with gas and air. Yesterday for my test i refused a sedative, on the basis that i wanted to know exactly what the doctor saw and be able to ask questions. Instead i was given gas & air. last used by me 23 years ago to get me through a 36 hour labour. Let's just say, next time I shop for a party i'm getting myself a cannister of that!!!!

Surfice to say it helped the uncomfortable process of having a camera put into what I only see as an exit, and the hour it took for the examination and biopsies (7 of em!) of my large intestine. There were what the doctor called "areas of concern" she attempted to go into my small intestine which was inflammed, but either due to the inflamation or scarring she couldn't. She said as well as "significant" IBS I have some "inflammatory bowel thing" going on and she is not suprised that I am experiencing extreme pain. The biopsies results will be with my consultant in two weeks so "hopefully" I will get a diagnosis and start treatment.

Who knows, i may just get my life back?!?!

Thanks to all my blog friends who have supported me. I will be around after the weekend and promise to catch up on all your blogging!

I came across this in the letters page of our local paper today, this is so good I thought I would share:

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No-one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't always fair and maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (you don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but over-bearing regulations were put in place.
Reports of a Six year old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding and unruly student, only worsened his condition.
Common sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they themselves failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.
It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer paracetomol, sun lotion or a plaster to a student, but could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband, churches became businesses, and criminals achieved better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar can sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live after a woman failed to realise that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.
He is survived by three stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else is to Blame and I'm a Victim.
Not many attended his funeral because so few realised he had gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.

All my friends or soon to be fiends, I challenge you to tel us more. Copy and paste the below onto your blog and put in yur own answers.

#1. So, why the username?

My name is Teresa and at school it was "cool" to shorten your name so my friends called me Teri. R is the first letrer of my surname. Boring I know!

#2. Give us one word to describe you:
Boring....tee hee, only kidding.

Loyal

#3.Chose one Desert Island Disc:

Oh my god, just 1 disc! it would have to be to Modfather of Britpop Paul Weller, probably Stanley Road if an album.

.#4. Chose one Desert Island Book:

Would have to be Great Expectations. I read a lot and as I am at the moment off ill am averaging a book a day. Short of taking the local Library, I would take my fave of all time!

#5.Chose one Desert Island Film:

Would have to be Against all odds - an oldy but a goody!

# 6. What floats your boat?
My family!

#7. Tell us something no one knows about you:

I bear grudges. Revenge is a dish best served cold!

#8. What's your idea of a dream date?

Dinner with my husband overlooking Sharks Bay in Egypt

#9. Do you believe in love at first sight?

No, I believe in lust at first sight, but love comes from knowing someone, BTW I fell in love with my hubby within a week!

#10. Which characteristic could you not live without in your life partner: sexiness, intelligence, or financial stability?

I couldn't live without the support of my family and friends.

#11. Where did you grow up?

A real Yorkshire lass, in a small (or was once) mining village

#12. Where do you live now and why?

I still live in the village, round the corner from my mums

#13. When you were young, what did you want to be when you grew up?

Paul Weller's wife! I can't remember

#14. When you were a child, who was your hero?

My dad!

#15.How would your friends describe you?

Quirky sense of humour, reliable (I hope)

#17. Have you ever met a celeb? What did you say?

I met Peter Shilton but didn't know it was him!

I was working in a hotel bar and the glass collectors had asked me to let them know if he cam into the bar, I was serving and the bar supervisor came in. I said to her "apparently Peter Shilton is here, can you let the lads know if he comes in" I turned to my customer who was laughing, as were his mates. I said "erm,.... are you him" he said yes. My brothers have never let me live it down.

I didn't know who he was!

#18. What's your all-time favourite football ground?

Rotherham United at Millmoor.

#19. What's your favourite outdoor activity?

Erm.... my daughter may read this!

#20. What capital cities have you visited? Which was your favourite?

I have visited Cairo (dirty) London (dirty) Cardiff (welsh) and Edinburgh (dirty) I visited Gothenburg (is it a capital) which was beautiful!

#21. What is your favourite British city?

York

#22. Who has been the biggest influence in your life?

My dad is a big influence and always has been, full of fun and a good dad!
He was diagnosed with cancer in December last year, and promptly declared we were not allowed to "blart" (his word for crying) He had an op in January and almost died. To see him now, getting back into his normal routine is amazing and I am so greatful we have this time with him!

#23. What do people notice most about you when they first meet you?

My "silly" curly hair and big boobs!

#24. When was the last time you lost your temper and why?

With bad service on the phone to O2, I work in a contact centre and hate bad service!

#25. When's the last time you cried and why?

The last time was at my yesterday, my friend died in Septmeber and the played Brian Adam's Heaven at her funeral. Yesterday it was played on the radio and i cried

#26. Are you the star of the show or more behind the scenes?

I am behind the scenes. i have suffered with my weight all my life so do not draw attention to myself, but I am not afraid to step forward if need be.

#27. Do you screen your calls or answer after the first ring?

We have caller display and ignore witheld numbers.

#28. What do you do when you're bored silly?

Eat! no I used to now I blog or read

#29. Which of your five senses would you LEAST want to lose?

None, though I think taste would be good (may help with the weight)

#30. When you're lost, do you ask for directions?

I'm a woman, of course I do!

#31 Have you ever participated in a protest?

Miners Strike! I was on the picket line!

#32. Who would play you in the movie of your life?

Would have to be Dawn French!

#33. If you are a cat, which life are you working on now?

I would be on a bout life 6

#34. If you could invite a famous person to dinner, who would it be?

Aside from paul Weller (who would be dinner!) I would invite Tony Blair to aks him why he felt the Labour Party should target middle england and sell out to the working class which are the parties roots.

#35. If you could bring someone back from the dead, who would it be?

My brother Barry. He had long curly hair he used to iron straight. He would love hair straightners. Also my mum and dad have never got over his loss, it would be good to bring him back, if only so they can say goodbye

#36. If you had your own music festival, what five bands or musicians would play?

Paul Weller...see a theme!
Madness
Zutons
Arctic Monkeys
and for my hubby Iron Maiden

Do you think anyone would come?

#38. If you could live anywhere, where would you live?

Porthcurno in cornwall, a little piece of paradise!

#39. If you could go back in time, which era would you choose? What would you most like to do?

I would like to have seen the 40's I know we were at war, but it's a decade that made us brits what we are!

ONE WORD ANSWERS

Sunset or sunrise? - Sunrise

Always early or always late? - Always early

Espresso or Latte? - Latte

Corrie or EastEnders? Corrie (occasionally)

The Beatles or The Stones? - Beatles

Morning person or night owl? - Night Owl

Three suitcases or one carry-on? - Three suitcases

The film or the book? - The book!

The chicken or the egg? - Chicken

Billiards or darts? - Darts

Gym or park? - Park

Sweet or savoury? - Savoury

Marmite or marmalade? - marmalade... marmite is rank!

Rich or famous?- Rich, so I can share

Dance or sing? - Dance, you don't wanna hear me sing!

Thanks for listening

Teri
xxx

Watch this last night. Only the 89th time!

I was, and still am a mod, had the parka, wanted the scooter and love the music.

Made me come over all nostalgic when Jimmy utters the words "You've killed my scooter!"

Today I will be mostly listening to The Who and 60's music

The "stuff" above is my diet for the day, I call it "stuff" as I cannot describe it. I have to mix each sachet with 1 litre of water and drink over a 1.5 hour period. I have 4 of the bloody things

It tastes horrid but I have to do it. I have decided to liken it to champagne, I don't actually like the taste of champagne but sometimes you just HAVE to drink it.

Therefore I am drinking the "stuff" from a champagne flute

Cheers

Hi

just a quick blog, nothing to say, not done a thing, except:

Played online bingo (naughty)
Watched colin Fry & John Edwards (Iknow!!! but I was bored!!!)
Eaten white bread (first in 12 weeks) and no fruit.

Breakfast tomorrow, then nothing to eat till after the test on Friday afternoon

I'll let you know how it goes.

Hope you are all well, signing off as daugher due back from first Karate grading (fingers crossed)

Play the Office Game

Here's a way to spice up your office. Pick two or three colleagues and agree to play the Office Game which awards points as follows:

ONE POINT

Run one lap around the office at top speed. Walk sideways to the photocopier.

Find the vacuum and start vacuuming around your desk.

When they're not looking, pour most of someone's fresh cup of coffee into your mug leaving them with an inch of brew.

Ignore the first five people who say 'good morning' to you.

Phone someone in the office you barely know, leave your name and say "Just called to say I can't talk right now. Bye."

To signal the end of a conversation, clamp your hands over your ears and grimace.

While riding an elevator, gasp dramatically every time the doors open.

THREE-POINTS

Babble incoherently at a fellow employee then ask "Did you get all that, I don't want to have to repeat it." - Double points if you do this to a manager.

Kneel in front of the water cooler and drink directly from the nozzle.

Shout random numbers while someone is counting.

FIVE POINTS

At the end of a meeting, suggest that, for once, it would be nice to conclude with the singing of the national anthem (extra points if you actually launch into it yourself).

Walk into a very busy person's office and while they watch you with growing irritation, turn the light switch on/off 10 times.

For an hour, refer to everyone you speak to as 'Bob'.

Announce to everyone in a meeting that you "really have to go do number two".

After every sentence, say 'mon' in a really bad Jamaican accent. As in, "the report's on your desk, mon". Keep this up for one hour.

While an office mate is out, move their chair into the elevator.

In a meeting or crowded situation, slap your forehead repeatedly and mutter, "Shut up, all of you just shut up!"

In a colleague's diary, write in 10 am: "See how I look in tights".

Carry your laptop over to your colleague and ask "You wanna trade?"

Repeat the following conversation 10 times to the same person: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now"

Come to work in army fatigues and when asked why, say, "I can't talk about it"

Speak with an accent (French, German, Porky Pig, etc.) during a very important conference call.

Tuck one pant leg into your sock and when queried, answer, "not now" and walk away.

Wll went to Fat Class, I have gained 1/2lb. You "non dieters" out there will be saying "so what?" but a gain is a gain.

I am confident that have not gone off track, so am not getting overly bothered. This week will be difficult. I have a test on Friday so from tomorrow I cannot eat Fibre or Fruit, which will be difficult to do. From Thursday brekky I cannot eat and need to drink 4 litres of stuff to "wash out" my system. Ok, ok a little too much info I know!

Am still in loads of pain, been ongoing since Friday night so hopefully whatever is causing the pain will be in the right spot and let the doctors see it!!

Have a good week all, I'll get on when I can.

Yay

I got meself one of them there ticker things!! Thanks to welshgirl for instructions.

Not done much today, cooked Sunday lunch, chicken, stuffing, mash & roast potatoes, Yorkshires, Cabbage, green beans and gravy. Very nice, even if I say so myself. Hubby's day off so nice to spend some time together, though he has just got off 6x12 hour night shifs so his eyes look like pee holes in the snow!!

Made some homemade tomato soup and a cheescake. Both SW recipes so I can have ALL the soup and 1/2 the cheescake if I so desire Yummy!

Fat class tomorrow, and also the only day I can eat normally this week. I have a colonoscopy on Friday (fingers crossed I get a diagnosis), so it's light diet till Thursday then nothing till after that. Oh well think of the weight loss.

Hope you all had a chilling weekend and are ready for the week ahead

Hope the embed works this time!

I'm really liking James Morrison at the moment. They played "You give me something" at my friends funeral. The above is his latest and I'm off to but the album tomorrow!